Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy in Oakland, CA

What is EFT Couples Therapy?

Emotionally Focused couple therapy is an evidence-based model for couples and families developed by Sue Johnson and her team at the University of Toronto. The model is based on attachment theory and the belief that all human beings need to feel loved, accepted and cared for by their families and partners.

Most couples in conflict tend to react to each other in particular ways that keep the conflict going. Over time, a repetitive pattern emerges that keeps the couple locked in a negative cycle.

We help to interrupt their repetitive negative interactions and learn to reach for each other for nurturance and support.

How do EFT therapists help?

By strengthening their emotional bond and feelings of secure attachment, EFT therapists help couples to create a more emotionally open and receptive way of interacting. The goal of EFT is to help couples to feel safe sharing their vulnerable feelings, fears and attachment-related longings.

Being the ‘best you can be’ is really only possible when you are deeply connected to another. Splendid isolation is for planets, not people.
— Sue Johnson

What we do in Emotionally Focused Therapy?

Emotionally Focused Couples/ Family therapy is broken down into stages. In Stage One we begin to identify the emotions, needs and longing that are fueling disconnection. As families and couples begin to identify and access their emotions fueling the disconnecting behavior, fights and disagreements begin to be less frequent and less severe. When couples reach a state of de-escalation they find that they have more empathy for their partner. Once de-escalation is achieved, the work moves to the next stage of restructuring the bond between partners. This stage creates a new narrative of the relationship and fosters a deeper more satisfying relationship.

What is the EFT therapist’s role in Emotionally Focused Therapy?

Emotionally Focused Couples/Family therapists are process consultants. We provide a safe and nurturing environment for couples and families to explore vulnerabilities, insecurities, and their unmet needs. Emotionally Couples therapy is a non-judgmental non pathologizing model as therapist we believe that all behavior can be explained in the context of the underlying.

Contact me to learn more about emotionally focused therapy in Oakland.